Place: Hard Rock Community Church
$100 a month for housing allowance
Send resume to: Hardnose777@cs.com
Our church wants a preacher, a preacher of fame,
Not too fond of sensation, nor prosy and tame;
But one who has good learning, devotion and skill,
And can live on a pittance, will just fill the bill.
We feel in our hearts we can justly expect
He shall not be too young to command our respect;
Nor do we want one who is decrepit and old,
But one who will add to the strength of our fold.
The pastor we’re seeking and hoping to find
Must be active, earnest, helpful and kind;
Not too conservative or fond of the past,
Not too progressive, too daring or fast.
The success of our church on the preacher depends,
So we trust he will know how win a host of friends.
He must not be frivolous, too exciting or light,
Nor yet be so solemn our souls would be affright.
There’s one fault that all of our pastors have shown
They expected that part of the time was their own.
But we have the right, for the money we pay,
To call for his service both night and day.
He must be one who can live, work, and suffer; yet never complain.
If he ever fails, his resignation we will obtain.
He should always be humble, meek, and never puffed up with pride,
Nor greedy, selfish, or dissatisfied.
Finally, he should be thankful to take what our church can afford,
Knowing patience is always his own best reward.
Revised and edited by Kent McClain